Loud Lincoln Odyssey 2: Electric Boogaloo
by Anthony Staffenhagen
Summary: Anthony wins an Ace Savvy gift basket that Lincoln really wanted. Lincoln will stop at nothing to get it from him.
1. Chapter 1

The boom operator was in the Loud house talking to the new camerawoman.

Camerawoman: If you're worried I won't do a good job filming the show, I can assure you I have plenty of experience.

Boom Operator: Like what?

Camerawoman: I filmed my daughter's birthday once.

Boom Operator: Ok, but I'm just really gonna miss…..Dang it, what was his name?

Lincoln came in looking upset, because he was.

Boom operator: Something the matter, Oln?

Camerawoman: Do you not want us to record you right now?

Lincoln: Actually, please do. I like telling people about what's goin' on in my life.

The camerawoman started filming.

Lincoln: Getting tickets to a movie. Sounds easy, right? Well, this isn't just any movie I'm trying to get tickets to. It's the special early release of Ace Savvy 2. I mean, I could just wait until it officially comes out in June, but getting to see it 5 and a half months before anyone else would be the COOLEST THING EVER!

Camerawomen: Well, you wouldn't be seeing it before ANYONE else. You'd be seeing it at the same time as the other people in the theater. And obviously the people who made it saw it before you.

Lincoln: …..Anyway, because there's only one movie theater in Kalos, and it's tiny, it has been IMPOSSIBLE to get tickets. Me and Clyde have been trying to for weeks, but no luck. And now there's only two seats left. At this point, we're gonna need a miracle.

Guy on the radio: What's happenin', Kalos? This is DJ Miracle and you just heard a popular song we've already played like 30 times today. And it's time for another SPECIAL CONTEST!

Boom operator: Maybe the prize will be the Ace Savvy 2 tickets.

Lincoln: I highly doubt I could get that lucky.

DJ Miracle: This month's prize is this very special Ace Savvy gift basket, featuring two tickets to the New Year's Eve screening of Ace Savvy 2, which will have a guest appearance by Bill Buck, creator of the franchise.

Lincoln: Wow. What are the odds?

DJ Miracle: From what I've been told, these are the last two tickets to the movie in all of Kalos. So if you want 'em, you better hurry and call in at 555-3245 and tell me what day in 2007 the first episode of iCarly premiered.

Lincoln: The first episode of iCarly?

 **FLASHBACK**

Lynn Sr. was in front of Anthony's house with most of his kids. Anthony was wearing a different shirt than usual.

Lynn Sr.: Is that an iCarly shirt?

Anthony: Heck yeah! It's the 10th anniversary.

 **END OF FLASHBACK**

Lincoln: *gasp* Leni's birthday! It was Leni's birthday! I can't believe this, Anthony's existence finally does some good!

Lincoln ran over to the phone and called the radio station.

DJ Miracle: And we've got our first caller. What's your name, Caller #1?

Lincoln: Lincoln Loud!

DJ Miracle: Hey, aren't you the kid from that MTV show?

Lincoln: Yeah.

DJ Miracle: Well, do you know when in 2007 the first episode of iCarly premiered?

Lincoln: I sure do! September 9th!

DJ Miracle: Oooooooooooooooh…..I'm sorry, but that's wrong.

Lincoln: What? But…but but…

DJ Miracle: All callers get two guesses. Do you know when else the answer might be?

Lincoln: Uhh…

Lincoln looked over at his TV. Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles was on. He saw April and the 5 on her shirt.

Lincoln: Uhh…April….5th?

DJ Miracle: I'm sorry Lincoln, but that's wrong too.

Lincoln: *sigh* Well, thanks anyway.

Lincoln hung up the phone and then called Clyde.

Lincoln: Clyde, 94.3 is having a contest to win the tickets. As soon as you can, you need to call in and try to get the right answer. And remember, these are the last two tickets available, so you HAVE to win. But, no pressure.

Lincoln hung up.

Lincoln: I don't understand. I specifically remember Anthony said it was the 10th anniversary of iCarly on Leni's birthday. If it wasn't September 9th, then when in 2007 DID the first episode of iCarly premiere?

Anthony (on the radio): September 8th, unlikable woman!

Lincoln: …..*gasp* Oh, right! We thought it was Leni's birthday, but it turned out to be the day before.

DJ Miracle: Yes, that's correct. But there's no reason to call me names.

Anthony: Oh, sorry about that. I wasn't calling YOU an unlikable woman.

Boom operator: Man, it must feel horrible to have to lose the tickets to…..HIM.

Lincoln: …..This…this isn't happening. This isn't happening! Somebody wake me up!

DJ Miracle: Well, congratulations. Who are you gonna take with you to the movie?

Anthony: I don't know about that. But I know who I'm definitely NOT taking.

Lincoln fell to his knees.

Camerawoman: …..I'm totally lost.


	2. Chapter 2

**Anthony's House**

Celebi & Emolga: Happy happy happy Birthday! Everybody wants to wish you a Happy Birthday!

Diancie: Not everybody.

Marshadow blew out his birthday candles.

Diancie: Okay great, party's over. I'm gonna go hang out with Whatshername.

Celebi: You can't leave yet, Marshy still has to open his presents.

Marshadow: Actually Celebi, there's a present I'd like to give you first. So, we really should let Diancie leave.

Diancie: Good…..wait, wait, why do you need me to leave to give Celebi a present?

Marshadow: I just…do, okay?

Diancie: ….Yeah, I'm not leaving.

Marshadow: Alright then. I've already been delaying this WAY too much, it's about time I did it.

Marshadow got down on one knee and opened up a tiny black box with a ring inside of it.

Marshadow: Celebi…will you marry me?

*dramatic pause*

Marshadow then got thrown through the roof.

Celebi: I can't believe you just threw him through the roof…..Emolga! Why would you do that?

Emolga got awkward and then flew upstairs to hide in her Luxury Ball.

Celebi: I gotta go find Marshy.

Celebi flew through the hole in the roof to go look for him. Diancie looked up at the hole.

Diancie: And they never saw him again. Whazzup?!

Outside, Lincoln was standing in front of Anthony's house waiting for him to get home. Anthony showed up carrying the gift basket he won.

Lincoln: H…hey, Anthony. Wha….what you got there?

Anthony: It's the Ace Savvy gift basket I won on the radio this morning. They were gonna mail it to me, but I decided to go down there and pick it up myself because I just couldn't wait to rub it in your face, I mean have it…..No I don't, I mean rub it in your face.

Lincoln: Oh, I didn't know you liked Ace Savvy.

Anthony: I don't. I used to have no opinion on it, but once I found out it's your favorite thing, I decided that I hate it. Speaking of things that suck, what are you doing here?

Lincoln: Can't a guy just come over to hang out with his…..favorite….big…..brother?

Lincoln's eye was twitching while he said that.

Anthony: Whaaaaaat?! Of all the older brothers in the multiverse, you like me more than any of the others? That means you like me more than you like yourself. I am so flattered. And last I checked, there was no part of you that liked me even the tiniest little bit.

Lincoln: I..I..I..I never said that.

Anthony: I never said you said that. But now that you mention it, you did say that. And on my birthday. That was not very nice. Now if you'll excuse me…

Anthony went inside.

Lincoln: Hey, wait!

Lincoln followed him.

Diancie: This cake tastes like crud.

Anthony and Lincoln went upstairs.

Lincoln: Since you don't care about Ace Savvy…

Anthony: "Don't care about" doesn't mean "hate."

Lincoln: Right. Since you _hate_ Ace Savvy, can…can…can I have the gift basket?

Anthony (sarcastically): Oh, oh, oh, oh, is this something you want?

Lincoln: Yes!

Anthony: Oh, I had ABSOLUTLEY NO IDEA! You can't expect me to know things if you don't tell me.

Lincoln: So….can I have it? Pretty please?

Anthony: ….No. I'm just gonna leave it on my dresser here, and never use it. Ever.

Lincoln grabbed Anthony's head and pulled him up close to his face.

Lincoln: Alright, listen. I'm gonna make you an offer you can't refuse. You give me that gift basket, and I'll give you…

Lincoln pulled something green out of his back pocket.

Lincoln: …your hat!

Anthony: ….I refuse your offer.

Lincoln: What? Why?

Anthony: Because of something else you said on my birthday.

Lincoln: What?

Anthony: You said the first time you put my hat on, you had to put it in the washer and take a shower because it had Staffenhagen Cooties.

Lincoln: Psst, is that something I said? I have no memory of saying it. And if I did, I'm sure I didn't mean it.

Anthony: Well, you did! And there's something worse than Staffenhagen Cooties that you got in my hat. Something that can never be washed out, Loud Lesions. So no, I do not want my hat back. You ruined it and I can never wear it again.

Lincoln: …..Ok then. Is there anything else of mine that you want?

Anthony: No.

Lincoln: Please! You have to let me have the gift basket. Me and Clyde REALLY wanna see this movie. And I just realized that all the comics in there are ones I don't have. I let you have my copy of Super Mario Odyssey, so it's only fair.

Anthony: That's right, you did let me have that. And why was that again?

Lincoln: I did it out of the goodness of my heart and absolutely no other reason.

Anthony: No, that wasn't it. I'm pretty sure it was because YOU SAW MARIO WAS HERE WITHOUT TELLING ME AND THEN YOU WENT ON AN ADVENTURE WITH HIM!

Lincoln: How did you find out about that?

Anthony: Through the magic of SIGHT! Your cameraman tweeted about it.

Lincoln: Oh.

Anthony: And now I want you to apologize.

Lincoln: Ok, I'm sorry.

Anthony: Not to me! I want you to apologize to HIM!

Anthony pointed at a cardboard cutout of Gumball.

Lincoln: You want me to apologize to a cardboard cutout of a cartoon character?

Anthony: It's not the cardboard cutout, it's who the cardboard cutout REPRESENTS. And I want you to apologize to him because he wanted to meet Mario and never got to, unlike you.

Lincoln: Uhhm…okay. But just so you know, I AM sorry to you too.

Anthony: About what?

Lincoln: Oh you know, about…Halloween.

 **HALLOWEEN FLASHBACK (Based On A True Story)**

Anthony was in his house when he heard a knock on his door, naturally expecting it to be a Trick-or-Treater. It was no Trick-or-Treater.

Anthony (after opening the door): Are you Tom Kenny?

Tom Kenny: It is I, Tom Kenny, voice of SpongeBob SquarePants.

Anthony: Wh…wh…wh…what are you doing here? You want some can…can…candy?

Tom Kenny: I have never told this secret to anyone before, but I am an alien. I came here to Earth because it's much harder to get voice acting jobs on my home planet of Thlouse-13. But I must go now. My planet needs me.

Anthony: Why? What is it? Is the king dying and you're next in line for the throne? Are you at war with another planet?

Tom Kenny: My mom wants me to vacuum.

Anthony. Uh…okay. But why do you have to tell me this?

Tom Kenny: Vacuuming will only take about 10 minutes, but due to Thlouse-13's slower resolution around the sun, 14 million years will have passed by the time I return to Earth. That means I won't be able to voice SpongeBob anymore. I'm going to need a replacement. But not just any replacement. I need a true SpongeBob fan who has stuck with the show all these years and still likes it to this day. Only someone like that can truly take my place. That someone is…you.

Anthony dropped the bowl of candy he was holding.

Anthony: Oh my god. Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god!

Tom Kenny: And if you play your cards right, they might let you be a writer too.

Anthony: Is…is this actually happening?

Tom Kenny: So, what do you say?

Anthony (while starting to cry): Mr. Kenny, the fact you even considered me is such an honor. I…I…I was not prepared for this. But yes, of course I'll do it, Mr. Kenny. Best Halloween ever!

Anthony leaned in to give Tom Kenny a hug. But he couldn't because Tom Kenny was actually a hologram.

Anthony: What?

Anthony then heard a bunch of laughter coming from behind the wall in front of his house. The people laughing were Lincoln, his sisters, and Clyde. Lisa was carrying a hologram projector which she turned off.

This is what their Halloween costumes were:

Lori – Ninja Squirtle Leonardo

Leni – Camerupt

Luna – Lunatone

Luan – Mr. Mime

Lynn – Bulbasaur

Lincoln – Mewtwo

Clyde – Spinarak

Lucy – Gothitelle

Lola & Lana – Plusle & Minun

Lisa – Mimikyu

Lily – Alolan Vulpix

Anthony started to cry (not tears of joy this time) while everyone else continued to laugh at him. Luna then walked up to him.

Luna: You got tricked!

Anthony was now really mad, so he went back inside and slammed the door. The Louds and Clyde continued to laugh for a couple seconds, but then…

Lincoln: Couch!

Anthony threw his couch at them from the top floor, but they got out of the way in time.

 **END OF HALLOWEEN FLASHBASK**

Anthony: Yeah, I'm sorry about Halloween too.


	3. Chapter 3

Anthony: ….Well, what are you waiting for? Apologize.

Lincoln walked over to the Gumball cutout.

Lincoln: Uhh….I'm sorry….whoever you are…..Okay, so I get the gift basket NOW, right?

Anthony: Nope. That wasn't supposed to have anything to do with the gift basket. I wanted you to apologize regardless.

Lincoln: Well, what do I need to do for you in order to get it? Just name it and I'll do it…..maybe.

Anthony went over to his bed and sat down in it.

Anthony: Hhhm. I don't know. It would have to be something that's a really, REALLY big deal. But I'm just way too thirsty to make a big decision like that. I sure could go for a lemon-lime soda.

Lincoln: I'll go get you one.

Lincoln ran downstairs to the kitchen. He went to the fridge and got a bottle of lemon-lime soda called Ditto. And yes, a Ditto is on the label.

Diancie: I mean seriously? What the cake is this flavor? It's like sausage, barbeque chips, and leftover McDonald's. A person whose never eaten ever would find this disgusting.

Lincoln picked up a fork and took a bite of the cake.

Lincoln: I like it.

Lincoln went back upstairs and handed Anthony the bottle.

Lincoln: Here you go.

Anthony: Thank you.

Anthony was about to open it when…

Lincoln: Please, allow me to open it.

Lincoln took the bottle back and tried to open it. He had a very difficult time doing so.

Anthony: Just let me do it.

Lincoln handed the bottle back to Anthony.

Anthony: *tries to open it* Oh geez, no wonder you couldn't open it. *tries again* DIANCIE!

Diancie came upstairs.

Diancie: What?

Anthony: Open this.

Diancie used her chainsaw to cut off the top of the bottle. The soda spilled everywhere. Diancie went back downstairs.

Anthony: …You know what, I really prefer cans anyway.

Anthony got up.

Lincoln: No, no, don't get up. I'll go get it. And I'm gonna clean up that soda too.

Lincoln went downstairs. Anthony thought for a moment about what this all meant.


	4. Chapter 4

Celebi was in the Loud house in Lisa's room. She was looking at a map Celebi gave her.

Lisa: *science mumbo jumbo* Marshadow should be here.

Lisa circled the place on the map where she predicted Marshadow had landed. Lily was drawing pictures on the map with crayons.

Celebi: Celebi.

Lisa: I know. Your friend can throw surprisingly far.

Celebi took the map and left.

Celebi: Oh, why did it have to be Kanto?

Celebi went back home and was VERY sad.

Diancie: Why didn't you go after him? I mean, I'm glad you didn't. But, why?

Celebi: If he landed in Kanto, his trainer probably found him by now and put him back in the PC.

Diancie: Oh well, he's gone forever now. Too bad. So sad.

Celebi opened Emolga's Luxury Ball.

Celebi: Why did you throw Marshadow?

Emolga: ….Umm…would you buy it's because my parents got divorced when I was younger, so now I hate marriage?

Celebi: ….When was this?

Emolga: …Uhh…when I was 5…on my birthday. Yeah, that's it. It was my 5th birthday.

Celebi used her time travel powers to go back to Emolga celebrating her 5th birthday on Route 10.

Emolga's parents: CAKE! With too much frosting.

Celebi: Excuse me, but I'm Emolga's friend from the future and she told me that you two got divorced today. Is that true?

Emolga's mom (an Emolga): Of course not!

Emolga's dad (a Dunsparce): We love each other so much that us getting divorced is like…..I don't know, something that would never happen.

Emolga's mom: In fact, why don't we go see if we can get Emolga that baby brother she's been asking for?

Emolga's dad: OK!

Emolga's parents left.

Emolga: So I have a friend in the future? What's that like?

Celebi went back to the future.

Celebi: Why did you lie to me, Emolga? Why? Also, how come you never told me you had a brother?

Emolga: Because I don't. And I didn't lie. After you went back to the future, my parents got in a huge fight and then they got divorced.

Diancie: LIAR! Emolga is being a LIAR!

Emolga: You believe me, right Celebi?

Celebi: ….Yeah.

Diancie: WHAT?!

Celebi: But why you threw Marshadow doesn't matter anyway. I'm never gonna get to see him again.

Celebi got even sadder.

Diancie: ….Son of a Lincoln. I gotta go get Marshadow back, don't I?

Emolga: Why should you have to do it? I'm the one who caused this. **I** should be the one who has to go find him.

Diancie: Oh yeah, because you're totally capable of doing that. I'm going and that's that.

Emolga: But can I come with you?

Diancie: No way in heck. Celbs, what's Marshadow's trainer look like?

Celebi went to the laptop to get a picture.

Celebi: This is him.

Celebi showed Diancie a picture of Red, the super famous Pokémon Trainer.

Diancie: Got it.

Diancie went downstairs. Emolga followed her.

Diancie: I said you can't come!

Diancie left. Emolga STILL followed her.

Diancie: *groan*

Lincoln was in the living room giving Anthony a haircut.

Anthony: Hey, one of your sisters is named Lynn, right?

Lincoln: Yeah.

Anthony: So what does your mom do when she wants to talk to her, but your dad is also in the room?

Lincoln: What do you mean?

Anthony: Well, she can't just say "Lynn, I wanna talk to you," your dad might think she's talking to him. What does she do to specify which Lynn she means? Does she have to add "Jr." or "Sr." at the end every time? Or do your parents agree that if your mom says "Lynn," it means she wants to talk to the girl, and if she wants to talk to your dad, she'll say "Honey" or something.

Lincoln: I don't know. I never thought about that before.

Anthony: Ok. Follow-up question: Does anyone ever call Lynn "LJ?"

Lincoln: Why would someone call her LJ?

Anthony: Short for Lynn Jr.

Lincoln: No. That would be weird.

Anthony: But why is that? How come some letters can be put in front of J to make somebody's name, but others can't?

Lincoln: …..I don't know.

Lincoln finished the haircut.

Lincoln: Haircut's done.

Lincoln handed Anthony a mirror.

Anthony: ….It's a haircut. Ok, it's almost time for me to go to my movie, so I gotta get a ride.

Lincoln: I'm guessing you want me to do that.

Anthony: No, I can do it myself. But if you wanna do it, you can.

Lincoln went upstairs.

Anthony: I'm so glad there's nothing on the laptop that I can't let Lincoln see.

Anthony then realized that there was something on the laptop that he couldn't let Lincoln see.

Anthony: Oh my Arceus, there's something on the laptop that I can't let Lincoln see!

Anthony ran upstairs.

Anthony: DON'T LOOK AT THE LAPTOP!

Anthony noticed Lincoln was already looking at what he didn't want him to see.

Anthony: Never mind.

Lincoln: How are you instant messaging with…


	5. Chapter 5

Lincoln: …the CEO of Nickelodeon?

Anthony: That's none of your business. Just move so I can see if he said anything while we were downstairs.

Lincoln: He said it doesn't make sense for you to tell me to apologize to the cardboard cutout because me meeting Mario was your decision.

Anthony (really fast): IT'S NOT THE CARDBOARD CUTOUT, IT'S WHO THE CARDBOARD CUTOUT REPRESENTS!

Lincoln: Yeah, whatever. But what's this guy think he's talking about? Me meeting Mario wasn't your decision. How could it POSSIBLY be your decision?

Anthony: ….Just get out of the way and let me deal with this.

Anthony went over to the laptop.

Lincoln: Why does Nick's CEO care what you do anyway?

Anthony: Uhh…well, if you were a CEO, would you want to have to say your biggest fan is a jerkface?

Lincoln: Well, no. But that doesn't give him the right to tell you what to do. And why does he specifically care so much about what you do to me?

Anthony: …Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…..you see, here's the thing. The Loud House is on Ni….I MEAN MTV, and MTV and Nick are both owned by Viacom, so the CEO doesn't want me to be mean to you.

Lincoln: That still makes no sense. You're hiding something, and I wanna know what it is.

While Lincoln said that, Anthony typed in a message to the CEO of Nick and sent it.

Anthony: Read what I just wrote.

Lincoln: I've got a movie to go to. We'll talk about this later.

Anthony: I'm saying that to both of you.

Anthony went to the website for getting rides and saw that none were available.

Anthony: Aw man, there aren't any drivers available.

Lincoln: Is there another way I can get you to the movie theater?

Anthony: Well, there is ONE way.

Lincoln walked out of the house carrying Anthony on his back.

Anthony: Faster!

Lincoln: This is as fast as I can go.

Anthony: What are you, a Slowpoke?

Lincoln: No, I'm a human.

Anthony: Then how come you can't go any faster?

Lincoln: Because you're like 3 times my size.

Anthony: Come on, embrace your inner Sean Ryan Fox.

Lincoln: What does that mean?!

Anthony: You know what it means.

Lincoln: Stop doing that!

Anthony: Doing what?

Lincoln: Saying I know the answer to something when I obviously don't, because I'm the one who asked the question.

Anthony: I have only done that twice.

Lincoln: Well, that's two times too many!

Lincoln fell down.

Anthony: Well I'll never get to the movie theater at this rate. I'll just walk.

Anthony got up off of Lincoln and went back into the house. Lincoln got up. Anthony came back out with the gift basket.

Lincoln: I get the gift basket now?!

Anthony: Of course not. I'm taking it with me to the movie because I don't want you to steal it.

Anthony walked away.

Anthony: I feel there's something else I should take with me.

Anthony imagined his laptop.

Anthony: Eh, I'm sure it'll come to me.


	6. Chapter 6

Diancie and Emolga arrived in Kanto and found Red.

Diancie: There he is. Let's get this over with.

Diancie and Emolga went over to Red.

Diancie: Ok, that Marshadow of yours is my best friend's 2nd best friend. She obviously gets more use out of him then you do, so give him here.

Red: …

Diancie: That is a very compelling argument!

Diancie flew away and then Emolga followed her.

Emolga: But…he didn't even say anything. You could've so easily chainsawed him and took Marshadow.

Diancie: I know, but now Marshadow is out of my life.

Emolga: …..Celebi's gonna be really mad at you when we get home.

Diancie: No she's not, because I'm gonna tell her Marshadow said he WANTED to stay here in Kanto.

Emolga: …..

Emolga flew back to Red without Diancie noticing. Emolga used her cuteness to get him to give her Marshadow.

Emolga: Emolga.

Red: …

Red took Marshadow's Master Ball out of his pocket and gave it to Emolga. Emolga flew back to Diancie while hiding the Master Ball behind her back.

Emolga: I'm gonna fly home in a different direction than you.

Diancie: But the way I'm going is the fastest, why would you want to go a different way? Actually, I don't care. I'm glad I get to fly home without you.

Emolga got home later and Diancie was already there.

Emolga: Celebi, come outside, I've got something to show you.

Diancie: Oh, let me guess. You got Marshadow.

Emolga: How did you guess that so easily?

Diancie: I figured it out on the way home.

Emolga: Oh.

Emolga threw the Master Ball on the ground and it was…EMPTY!

Celebi (sad): What? I don't understand. How is this possible?

Emolga: I don't know. Well, looks like we've got a mystery to solve.

Diancie: I'm not a part of that "we."

Diancie left the room.

 **Elsewhere**

Anthony, Karli, and George walked out of the theater because the awesome movie they saw, Pokémon: I Choose You!, was over.

Anthony: Oh my Arceus, this is the greatest movie I've ever seen in my life!

Karli: Yeah, and the sky is blue.

Anthony, Karli, and George were surprised to see two people standing in front of them. It was Kel from Kenan & Kel and Gerald from Hey Arnold!

Anthony: …Kel Mitchell?

Kel: That's Kel KIMBLE.

Anthony: Uh….ok. What are you doin' here?

Gerald: ….We're here to kill you.

Anthony: ….Uh…is that a Hey Arnold! reference I'm not getting because I barely remember anything about the show?

Gerald: Nope. We're actually here to kill you.

Anthony: …Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh…

Kel: How come you drink lemon-lime soda? ORANGE soda is so much better!

Kel held up a 2 liter bottle of orange soda and drank the entire thing.

Kel: ORANGE SODA…PUNCH!

Kel punched Anthony so hard that he got flung into the air and out of sight.

Karli: ….Can I have your autograph?

Anthony crashed through the roof of his house and landed in his room next to Lincoln.

Lincoln: Whoa! Are you ok?

Anthony: Yeah, I'm fine.

Lincoln: …So, what does "get cancelled" mean?

Anthony: What are you talking about?

Lincoln: While you were at the movie, I was instant messaging with Nick's CEO pretending to be you and…

Anthony: You WHAT?!

Lincoln: It's ok, all I told him was that you didn't choose for me to meet Mario, and he doesn't get to tell you what to do.

Anthony: You don't understand! Both of those things have a logical explanation.

Lincoln: Ok, what are the logical explanations?

Anthony: …...

Anthony ran over to the laptop and typed in a message.

Anthony: I didn't say any of that, Lincoln did.

After a brief moment, Anthony got a response from the CEO. He read it out loud.

Anthony: I can't believe that you would blame this on him? I'm not blaming it on him! It's the truth! Ok, what else can I say to him that will…?

Anthony's laptop got slimed.

Lincoln: Where did that come…?

Anthony: Why did you talk to the CEO when I specifically told you not to?!

Lincoln: Because I thought I was…you never said that.

Anthony: …Oh right, I didn't.

Lincoln: Anyway, I thought I was helping.

Anthony: Well, you weren't. If you thought you had any chance of getting that gift basket today, you DEFINITELY have no chance to now! Because of you, I'm gonna get cancelled!

Lincoln: Again, what does that mean?

Anthony: …It means the CEO is sending people to kill me, alright?!

Lincoln: What?!

Anthony: And now that the laptop's been slimed, I gotta go down to Nickelodeon headquarters, hopefully not die on the way there, and try to convince the CEO in person to let me live, which is gonna be hard to do.

Anthony ran downstairs.

Lincoln: Wait! Let me come with you.

Anthony: I can't! You are not ready to see what's out there.

Lincoln: But I wanna help.

Anthony: ….Ok, but you're gonna have to wear this blindfold.

Anthony handed Lincoln a blindfold and he put it on.

Lincoln: You know, I'm not gonna be much use to you if I have this on.

Anthony: Good. Then you'll stay here, right?

Lincoln: No.

Anthony put the gift basket on the table and then went outside with Lincoln.

Anthony: Ok, you are going to hear a lot of familiar voices. But I assure you, they are NOT ACTUALLY the people you think they sound like. They are just a bunch of assassins, nobody special at all!

Lincoln: Ok, if you say so.

Anthony ran away from his house pulling Lincoln with him.

Anthony: Just keep running, even though you're wearing a blindfold and running while wearing a blindfold is something that should never be done ever.

Anthony and Lincoln came across someone.

Anthony: Oh-no, this isn't how I wanted this crossover to go!


	7. Chapter 7

It was the Ninja Steel Rangers and the 2012 Ninja Turtles. They all started attacking Anthony.

Lincoln: Leave him alone!

Lincoln tried to fight back, but because he was blindfolded, he was facing the wrong way. Anthony walked over to Lincoln and stood behind him. The Rangers and turtles ran away.

Lincoln: Yeah, you better run!...If running away is what you're doing. It sounds like that's what you're doing, but I can't tell for sure.

Anthony: I don't think the assassins are allowed to attack you. Are you willing to be my human shield?

Lincoln: Human shield?! Are you insane?

Anthony: It's ok, there's no way anybody's gonna hit you.

Lincoln: ….Uh….okay I guess.

Anthony picked Lincoln up and held him in front of his body.

Anthony: Alright, BRING IT ON!

Lincoln: No, no, don't bring it on. DON'T BRING IT ON!

Anthony started running. He ran past more Nickelodeon All-Stars like the characters from T.U.F.F. Puppy, the characters from Back at the Barnyard, the Penguins of Madagascar, Po from Kung Fu Panda, the Harvey Beaks characters, the cast of The Haunted Hathaways, the Mighty Quad Squad, and SO MUCH MORE! But none of them were able to attack him because he was using Lincoln as a human shield. While Anthony and Lincoln were running, various things and people got slimed.

Eventually, CatDog grabbed two trees and Anthony ran into them like a wrestling ring rope and got flung back. Danny Phantom and Jenny Wakeman then shot at him with their powers, causing him to drop Lincoln. Anthony then saw Rudy, Penny, and Snap from ChalkZone. Rudy had some chalk and was ready to draw something.

Anthony: Come on Rudy, don't do it! Us meeting could've gone so much better than this.

Rudy thought about what Anthony said, but then decided to draw something. What he drew was so crazy and insane, that I can't even describe it. It was something only Rudy Tabootie could think of. It started chasing after Anthony.

Anthony: *screams*

Anthony grabbed Lincoln and ran away. Anthony soon noticed Patchy the Pirate was up ahead in his boat.

Anthony: Oh-no, not another one!

Patchy: No, trust me, get in!

Anthony would've stopped to think about it, but Rudy's drawing was chasing him, so it wasn't the best time to think things over. He jumped into Patchy's boat and Patchy drove off.

Anthony: I don't understand. How come you're not an assassin?

Patchy: Do you know how many of us there are? A LOT! Obviously, not every single one of us is gonna agree to do what the CEO told us.

Potty: SQUAWK! It's a trap!

Patchy: Oh, don't listen to him.

Lincoln: Uhh…I really feel we SHOULD listen to him.

Anthony: Trust me, even if this is a trap, being in this boat, I MEAN CAR, is a lot better than the alternative.

Anthony looked up at Rudy's drawing.

Lincoln: Why? What's the alternative?

Anthony: Uhh…let's just say, I wish Diancie was here.

Ansi: Did that guy just say "die, Ansi?"

Saraline: I think he did.

Olly: Wow, whatever you did to him, he must've REALLY not liked it.

Ansi: I never did anything to him, I've never even seen that guy before. He must've been talking about some other Ansi.

The Welcome to the Wayne characters got slimed.


	8. Chapter 8

Patchy drove to the ocean and stopped his boat. Rudy's drawing tripped over the boat and fell into the water. This erased it into ChalkZone.

Patchy: …..Hey, Anthony.

Anthony: Yeah?

Patchy: Remember when I said that some of us aren't tryin' to get you?

Anthony (nervously): …..Yes.

Patchy: Well….I wasn't talking about me.

Patchy pushed Anthony into the water. He started laughing and drove off with Lincoln.

Lincoln: WHAT IS GOING ON?!

Anthony started drowning. Once he was under the water, the Bubble Guppies caught him and gave him a magic sea star, so HE could breathe underwater too. Anthony took a deep breathe and then fell asleep. The Bubble Guppies took him somewhere else and threw him onto the land. This woke him up. He looked up and saw that he was at the Nickelodeon headquarters.

Anthony: Oh my goodness, thank you! Thank you so much!

Anthony took off the magic sea star and ran inside. All 6 Bubble Guppies got slimed. Inside the headquarters, there were even MORE Nick All-Stars, like Sanjay & Craig, Bunsen and Mikey, the Breadwinners, and SO MUCH MORE!

Anthony: Ok, Patchy's boat is parked outside, which means Lincoln is here SOMEWHERE. But where? WHERE?!

?: They took him to the lunch break room.

Anthony: Who are you, Professor Exposition?

Professor Exposition: Why, as a matter of fact, I am.

 _Professor Exposition!_

 _Explainer of things!_

 _He's clarifying plot points_

 _To explain away confusion!_

Anthony: Ok, so where's the lunch break room?

Professor Exposition: I'm Professor Exposition, not Professor Completelymeaninglessdetails. Just look for the lunch room, and you'll find it.

Anthony went to a different floor, opened a door, and it was the lunch break room. It appeared to be empty.

Anthony: Wh…where's Lincoln?

Lincoln appeared behind Anthony with the blindfold off now

Lincoln: I'm right here.

Anthony: Ah! Wh…what happened?

Lincoln: Well, that guy who was driving us brought me in here and tied me to a chair. He said once he took my blindfold off, I was gonna start freaking out, then I said "I'm already freaking out!" He took my blindfold off, and it was just Tom Kenny playing Patchy the Pirate. He tried convincing me he REALLY WAS Patchy the Pirate, and no matter how much I kept telling him that was impossible, he wouldn't stop denying it. Then he jumped out that window while crying like a baby.

Anthony: ….Alrighty then. Let's go see that CEO and put a stop to all this madness.

Lincoln: Yeah!

Anthony: But you're gonna have to put the blindfold back on.

Lincoln: *groan* *puts the blindfold back on*

Lincoln and Anthony got in an elevator and Anthony pushed the button for the top floor.

Anthony: Ok, here's the plan. I'm gonna go into the CEO's office and…

Lincoln: Give him a piece of your mind!

Anthony (not sarcastically): No, I'm gonna beg and plead until he eventually agrees not to cancel me. You're gonna stand in front of the door, so that if any assassins come, they can't do anything.

Lincoln: Got it. What's this plan called?

Anthony: …..Do we really need to name the plan? We're about to do it, so what's the point?

Lincoln: Every important plan should have a name. I say we call it Operation:…

The elevator opened.

Anthony: Oh look, we're here. No time to name the plan. So, come on.

Anthony grabbed Lincoln and ran out of the elevator.

Anthony: Well…..there it is. The CEO of Nickelodeon's office!

Lincoln: Who is the CEO of Nickelodeon anyway?

Anthony: Let's just say….it's not SpongeBob…anymore.

Anthony went into the office and shut the door. Lincoln didn't go into the office.

Lincoln: …..It's not SpongeBob? Obviously! SpongeBob is a fictional character.

Anthony: You…you wanted to see me, sir?

Anthony looked up at the CEO sitting at his very high up desk and it was…


	9. Chapter 9

...THE REAL LINCOLN LOUD!

Real Lincoln: No I didn't actually.

Anthony: Yes, yes, I know. But uhh…about cancelling me. If you could, oh, I don't know…not do that, that would be just fantastic! So how about you tell everyone to stop trying to kill me, I'll go home and this can keep being the cliché "guy does things for person he doesn't like to get something from that person" storyline that it was supposed to be, and we can all just go on with our lives. Sound like a plan?

Real Lincoln: …..Very well. I'll let you go…..on 1 condition.

Anthony: What is it?

Real Lincoln: You know what it is.

Anthony: …..

Real Lincoln: See. That's how that feels. You either have to say what makes The Loud House good, or what makes Teen Titans Go! bad.

Anthony: …Can I by any chance do neither?

Anthony instantly regretted asking that.

Real Lincoln: ….You have to do both.

Anthony: *sigh* Ok…umm….Teen Titans Go! is too different from the show it APPEARS to be a reboot of.

Real Lincoln: That's not good enough.

Anthony: Umm…..The Loud House has good characters, they're just being used in horrible stories.

Real Lincoln: That's DEFINITELY not good enough.

Anthony: Umm…

Anthony realized something.

Anthony: …..FORGET YOU! My friend's got a time machine!

Anthony tried to open the door, but it electrocuted him.

Anthony: Ow! Why are you doing this anyway?

Real Lincoln: Because I don't like you taking the characters from my show and using them. How would you like it if I did that to you?

Anthony: …I'd think it was awesome actually. I'd love to see a different interpretation of the characters I created. As long as they're not too different, and it was done as tastefully as I did it for The Loud House.

Real Lincoln: Tastefully?! You think what you do is tasteful?! All you do is whine about how much you don't like The Loud House over and over and over again. We get it, you don't like the show. You can stop now!

Anthony: That may be what it started out as, but now it's a story about a guy having to deal with being half-brothers with his rival. The rival just happens to be based off you.

Real Lincoln: Oh really? You don't whine about how you don't like my show anymore? Then explain this scene.

Anthony: Hey wait! Don't show them…

 **SCENE FROM GREEN CHOCOLATE JELL-O PUDDING**

Anthony: And I hate it when things are more popular than they deserve to be.

Lola: Why were you looking at me when you said that?

Anthony: Because Lincoln isn't here.

 **END OF SCENE FROM GREEN CHOCOLATE JELL-O PUDDING**

Real Lincoln: Oh, and another thing. Why did you make it so you're the Louds' half-brother? That is so stupid. What were you thinking?!

Anthony: …That it would be a crazy big deal.

Real Lincoln: Well, it was TOO big of a deal. You did it just to get attention, not because you actually thought it was a good idea.

Anthony: That is so not…

Real Lincoln: Did you not think about how much it would confuse people?

Y Universe Lincoln came in with the blindfold still on.


	10. Chapter 10

Y Universe Lincoln: Leave my brother alone!

Real Lincoln: *gasp* Did you just say…?!

Y Universe Lincoln: Yes I did. Now stop telling him what to do. I don't know who you are, or why your voice sounds so familiar, but you SUCK!

Real Lincoln: Lincoln, you don't understand. Anthony is making you say all this.

Y Universe Lincoln: No he's not! I don't get why you think Anthony is able to control what I do, because he isn't.

Real Lincoln: Lincoln, listen to me, there's something you don't know. You're just a secondary character. Anthony's the main character, and he's based off the guy who writes this. Everything you've ever said or done, since you first met Anthony, has all been his choice.

Y Universe Lincoln: That is the biggest load of bologna I have ever heard. You seriously expect me to believe that?

Real Lincoln: But it's true. Just take that blindfold off, you'll see for yourself.

Y Universe Lincoln: Fine!

Y Universe Lincoln was about to take his blindfold off when…

Emmet from The LEGO Movie ran in! He was carrying two LEGO bricks stuck together.

Emmet: Ah ha! Take that!

Emmet threw the LEGO thing at Real Lincoln. Once it hit him, there was an explosion and Real Lincoln turned into an awfully rugged rock.

Real Lincoln: How did this happen? How is he even here?

Anthony: ….You…know…how! And that's how THAT feels! Come on, little bro, let's get out of here.

Y Universe Lincoln: *gasp*

Anthony: Yeah, that's right. I just called you that. You're not as horrible as I thought you were. In fact, I may even like you.

Real Lincoln: Ok, now THAT'S a load of bologna.

Anthony: Hey Emmet, will you hit that button on the CEO's desk for me?

Emmet went over to the desk and hit the button. It opened a hole in the floor under Anthony & Y Universe Lincoln, causing them to fall through a chute. SpongeBob came into the room. He noticed Real Lincoln had been turned into a rock.

SpongeBob: *gasp* Does this mean I get my job back?

Anthony and Lincoln got back to Anthony's house by falling through the chute.

Lincoln: *heavy breathing* I have no idea what any of that was about, mostly because I couldn't see anything, but I am so glad it's over. Can I please take this off now?

Anthony took Lincoln's blindfold off for him.

Lincoln: Thanks…So…

Anthony & Lincoln: Did you really mean all that stuff you said back there?...Yeah, I guess I did.

Anthony: One thing's for sure, I like you more than the CEO. Are we friends now?

Lincoln: Yeah…I guess so…..Well…see you later.

Lincoln went over to the table and picked up the gift basket.

Anthony: Whoa, whoa, whoa, what do you think you're doing?

Lincoln: …Are you saying, that after all that's happened today, I **STILL** don't get the gift basket?!

Anthony: I feel you should know that you don't.

Lincoln: …..

Lincoln was so very, VERY angry.


	11. Chapter 11

Lincoln: I take back everything I said!

Lincoln ran for the front door.

Anthony: Me too!

Anthony tackled Lincoln. Anthony & Lincoln kept fighting over the gift basket.

Lincoln: I knew me and you making up was too good to be true. How did things go back to normal so quickly?

Anthony: Well, when you think about it, us making up was happening way too quickly too, so I don't know why you're so surprised.

Anthony & Lincoln kept fighting until Grace came in.

Grace: STOP!

Anthony & Lincoln stopped.

Grace: What is going on here?

Anthony & Lincoln talked at the same time, making it impossible to tell what they were saying.

Grace: ONE AT A TIME!

Anthony: I won this gift basket fair and square, and Lincoln thinks I have to give it to him just because he wants it.

Lincoln: Anthony doesn't want this gift basket and won't let me have it even though I've been doing stuff for him all day!

Grace: Ok, ok. There's only one way to settle this.

Anthony: Aw yeah! Super Half Bros. Melee!

Grace: No. Not that. You boys are gonna share the stuff in there. Whoever wins this coin flip gets to pick something out of it first.

Grace got a coin and then flipped it.

Lincoln: TAILS!

Grace: It's Heads.

Lincoln: Dang it.

Anthony: You should've picked heads. It's almost usually heads.

Grace: Ok Anthony, you get to pick first.

Anthony: VICTORY! Alright, for my first choice, I want…

Grace: And no, your reason for picking something can't be "so Lincoln can't have it."

Anthony: ….Oh. Well, in that case…..I want…..none of this.

Grace: …Really?

Anthony: Yeah. "So Lincoln can't have it" is the only reason I would want any of this stuff.

Grace: Oh. Well…then I guess you get it all, Lincoln.

Lincoln: Wahoo!

Lincoln grabbed the gift basket.

Lincoln: Can I use your phone?

Grace: Sure.

Lincoln went over to the phone and called Clyde.

Lincoln: Clyde, I got the tickets!…..Yeah, I know! We are gonna have the greatest New Year's Eve ever! Okay, talk to you later.

Lincoln hung up and ran for the front door.

Anthony: Wait! Can I at least have the basket? Not the stuff in it, just the basket itself?

Lincoln: Uhh…that's a pretty weird thing to want, but sure. Do you have something else I can put the stuff in?

Anthony got Lincoln a big We "R" Us bag and then Lincoln walked out of the house after putting the Ace Savvy stuff in that bag.

Grace: Bye, Lincoln. See you for Thanksgiving.

*record scratch*

Lincoln: Seriously?

Grace nodded yes.

Lincoln: …..Well, at least it's not Christmas.


	12. 12 is a number associated with Christmas

**1 Month and 20 Days Later**

Anthony came into Lincoln's room carrying a present.

Anthony: Merry Christmas!

Lincoln: Is that present for me?

Anthony: No, the reason it says "To: Lincoln" on it is because it's for Lucy.

Anthony handed the present to Lincoln. Lincoln sniffed it.

Lincoln: Well, it doesn't smell like poop.

Anthony: Just open it.

Lincoln opened it.

Lincoln: An empty basket?

Anthony: Yeah, you recognize that basket?

Lincoln looked at the basket for a second then remembered it.

Lincoln: Oh wait, is this…?

Anthony: Yeah. It's the Ace Savvy gift basket. The reason I'm giving it to you was because it was supposed to be your Christmas present all along. That's the whole reason I entered that radio contest in the first place.

Lincoln (shocked): ….R…really?

Anthony: Yeah, really.

Lincoln: …Wow. I don't know what to say. Th…thank you. Wh….why'd you do that?

Anthony: Because I wanted our first Christmas together as brothers to be a good one, but you ruined it! Thanks a lot.

Anthony was about to leave the room, but then Lincoln figured something out.

Lincoln: You are SO lying!

Anthony: What?! I most certainly am not!

Lincoln: If you were gonna give it to me anyway, you wouldn't have made me do all that stuff for you.

Anthony: Hey! I never MADE you do anything. You did all that stuff willingly. And the reason I wasn't giving it to you is because I wanted it to be a Christmas present.

Lincoln and Anthony continued to argue about this.

Fa la la la la la la la la!

 **Merry Christmas**

The "Merry Christmas" text got slimed.


End file.
